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Gilles
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« on: January 19, 2004, 06:57:13 pm » |
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Received by mail...
Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day, and they both go before the angel to find out if they'll be admitted to heaven.
Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the angel must decide which of them gets in.
The angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to heaven, whereupon she takes off her top and says, "Look at these. They're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm surei t will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity."
The angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question. The Queen drops her skirt and panties, takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, shakes it up, and douches with it.
The angel says, "OK,your Majesty, you may go in."
Dolly is outraged..."What was that all about? I show you two of God's own perfect creations and you turn me down. She performs a rude act of hygiene and she gets in. Would you explain that to me?"
"Sorry, Dolly," says the angel, "but even in heaven, a royal flush beats a pair, no matter how big they are."
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Le Mans is life, anything before and after is just waiting...
... it's not the taking part but the winning that counts !
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dryhen
CA Veteran
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Posts: 116
Bedford CF Challenger
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« Reply #1 on: January 20, 2004, 06:30:00 pm » |
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Did you translate that from a French original ?? I like your republican sense of humour  |
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The older I get, the faster I was.
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Gilles
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« Reply #2 on: January 20, 2004, 06:33:21 pm » |
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I don't translate it from French... ... I succeed to understand it in its original language, and it's almost untranslatable in my language. For the Republican sense of humour, this joke is coming from the USA  ... ... and I'ld be too nasty a boy to translate jokes about their so-called President |
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Le Mans is life, anything before and after is just waiting...
... it's not the taking part but the winning that counts !
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Bobblehat
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« Reply #3 on: January 20, 2004, 06:37:09 pm » |
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... and I'ld be too nasty a boy to translate jokes about their so-called President Oh go on ................  |
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Ruptured Duck Motorsport
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« Reply #4 on: January 20, 2004, 06:38:45 pm » |
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go on Gilles... G.W.B. deserves it |
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Scarred old slaver know he’s doin’ alright.
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Gilles
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« Reply #5 on: January 20, 2004, 06:43:11 pm » |
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If I want to flight to Sebring next year, I don't want to be "personna non grata" in the USA.  |
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Le Mans is life, anything before and after is just waiting...
... it's not the taking part but the winning that counts !
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dryhen
CA Veteran
Full Member
Offline
Posts: 116
Bedford CF Challenger
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« Reply #6 on: January 21, 2004, 06:13:36 pm » |
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"If I want to flight to Sebring next year, I don't want to be "personna non grata" in the USA." Gilles- Don't worry about that - anyone not having an Uncle Sam passport already is ! |
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The older I get, the faster I was.
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Matt Harper
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« Reply #7 on: January 21, 2004, 08:48:11 pm » |
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Not strictly true, Dryhen. The yanks are now quite fond of the British, for standing shoulder to shoulder in the fight against middle eastern tyranny. It has to be said that they are a little less keen on the French, due to their views on the same subject. I suspect that Gilles has been Angicised enough by this website to fool US Immigration, however.
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If it\'s good and fast, it won\'t be cheap. If it\'s fast and cheap, it won\'t be good. If it\'s good and cheap, it won\'t be fast.
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Matt Harper
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« Reply #8 on: January 21, 2004, 09:38:04 pm » |
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To further separate our two cultures (as if we needed to) JD Power and Assocs have just published USA top selling new vehicles
At # 1 .... The Ford F Series (pick-up truck)
At # 2 ..... The Chevy Silverado (erm, pick-up truck)
And at # 3.....The Dodge Ram (you guessed it......)
The Toyota Camry staggers in a lowly 4th and is the first vehicle on the list that you couldn't tote an ATV in.
I confess to having a 5.9L 1500 Ram and The Mayor of Truckville has got me out of a few scrapes, but it is a wierd state of affairs when the top 3 new vehicles in this country are used as milk vans by their equivilants in Britain.
Yeee haww and all that.
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If it\'s good and fast, it won\'t be cheap. If it\'s fast and cheap, it won\'t be good. If it\'s good and cheap, it won\'t be fast.
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Mr. Rick
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« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2004, 12:27:24 pm » |
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Yeee haww and all that.
How is the old gene pool over there? |
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dryhen
CA Veteran
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Offline
Posts: 116
Bedford CF Challenger
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« Reply #10 on: January 22, 2004, 06:07:49 pm » |
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I suspect that Gilles has been Angicised enough by this website to fool US Immigration, however. Matt - But, likewise, have our American cousins been Francocised (sounds like an operation !) enough to fool the French in June ??  |
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The older I get, the faster I was.
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dryhen
CA Veteran
Full Member
Offline
Posts: 116
Bedford CF Challenger
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« Reply #11 on: January 22, 2004, 06:13:31 pm » |
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To further separate our two cultures (as if we needed to) And at # 3.....The Dodge Ram (you guessed it......)
Yeee haww and all that.
Matt - is it the Ram3500 that has twin rear wheels, and looks like it has had Botox injected in it's buttocks ? |
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The older I get, the faster I was.
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Matt Harper
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« Reply #12 on: January 22, 2004, 07:46:00 pm » |
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I suspect that Gilles has been Angicised enough by this website to fool US Immigration, however. Matt - But, likewise, have our American cousins been Francocised (sounds like an operation !) enough to fool the French in June ?? I think the French are a little more pragmatic and a lot less hysterical than the Americans - they let all of us lot in each year. after all. |
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If it\'s good and fast, it won\'t be cheap. If it\'s fast and cheap, it won\'t be good. If it\'s good and cheap, it won\'t be fast.
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Matt Harper
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« Reply #13 on: January 22, 2004, 07:59:23 pm » |
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To further separate our two cultures (as if we needed to) And at # 3.....The Dodge Ram (you guessed it......)
Yeee haww and all that.
Matt - is it the Ram3500 that has twin rear wheels, and looks like it has had Botox injected in it's buttocks ? Yes, Dryhen both the 2500 and 3500 are available as a 'Duelie' - that is to say, twin wheel rear axle and big flares on the rear fenders. Mainly offered for rednecks with particularly small penises, there are a few 'Working Joe's" who actually need a truck this gigantic. I'd estimate that around 50% of vehicles on the road in Central FL are pick-ups and more than 90% of them have a tonneau over the bed - i.e. never used to lug stuff about. I inherited mine with the job and only rarely use it as a work vehicle. In extremis is the Super-Ram, with an 8 litre V10 (detuned Viper engine), the Ford 150 Lightning, 4.7 Supercharged, 160 mph rubble carrier and the new Chevy SS. All very bizarre, but wouldn't life be boring if everything was the same. |
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If it\'s good and fast, it won\'t be cheap. If it\'s fast and cheap, it won\'t be good. If it\'s good and cheap, it won\'t be fast.
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Robbo SPS
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« Reply #14 on: January 23, 2004, 01:57:17 am » |
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Life wouldnt be the same if the yanks couldnt do it bigger than anyone else
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Take life by the horns and live it.
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