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1

General Discussion / Re: Red Bull Air Race @ Longleat today

« on: September 05, 2006, 10:09:14 am »

Lord Bath is a legend! was one of only 4 things that made the day ok

other 3 -
running frantically round the maze trying to beat my mates
mini party in th eflatbed in the carpark trying to leave
pulling up in said flatbed to a random pub in salsbury to watch a good england performance

we were slightly confused as to who (tv channel) was gonna be showing it cos i had seen that c4 were showing it on tv but there was a load of bbc lorries and equipment - maybe steve ryder and louise ggodman were presenting for the bbc's coverage?

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General Discussion / Re: Red Bull Air Race @ Longleat today

« on: September 03, 2006, 12:08:06 pm »

hmmm... dunno who that was then

smokie, did you see anything of a rather large navy blue flatbed in the carpark on the way out? our shenanigans could be heard from some distance!!

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General Discussion / Re: Red Bull Air Race @ Longleat today

« on: September 02, 2006, 11:02:42 pm »

i went, was a bit dissapointing, altho we did end up in the maze which is always fun and also had a mini party in the car park with the works flatbed!! which carpark were you in smokie? i was in red

the female presenter was louise goodman from F1, didnt really catch much of what she was saying tho

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General Discussion / Re: The (Unrelated To Le Mans) Joke Thread

« on: August 02, 2006, 02:56:16 pm »

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General Discussion / Re: The (Unrelated To Le Mans) Joke Thread

« on: August 01, 2006, 06:08:58 pm »

Incredible story about an elephant's memory...UPI July 3, 2006

A young man was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from college. While he was walking through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.

The elephant seemed distressed so the man approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot. There was a large thorn deeply embedded in the bottom of the foot.

As carefully and as gently as he could he worked the thorn out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man and with a rather stern look on its face, stared at him. For a good ten minutes the man stood frozen -- thinking of nothing else but being trampled.

Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away.

The man never forgot that elephant or the events of that day. Twenty years later the man was walking through the zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to where they were standing at the rail. The large bull elephant stared at him and lifted it's front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times, all the while staring at the man. The man couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant.

After a while it trumpeted loudly; then it continued to stare at him.

The man summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder.

Suddenly the elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of the man's legs and swung him wildly back and forth along the railing, killing him....

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

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General Discussion / Re: The (Unrelated To Le Mans) Joke Thread

« on: July 28, 2006, 04:15:52 pm »

A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the
appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would
now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on.

The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for
the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the
computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to
his wife what he was entering by stating each letter out loud as he
typed....

P

E

N

I

S

His wife fell off her chair laughing when the

computer replied:

***PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH**

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General Discussion / Re: The (Unrelated To Le Mans) Joke Thread

« on: June 26, 2006, 04:59:52 pm »

1. What do you call a chav in a box?

innit.

2. What do you call a chav in a filing cabinet?

Sorted

3. What do you call a chav in a box with a lock on it?

Safe.

4. What do you call a chav on fire?

Blazin'

5. Why are Chavs like slinkies?

They have no real use but it's great to watch one fall down a flight of
stairs.

6. What do you call a Chavette in a white tracksuit?

The bride.

7. You're in your car and you see a Chav on a bike, why should you try
not to hit him?

It might be your bike.

8. What's the difference between a Chav and a coconut?
One's thick and hairy, the other's a coconut.

9. What's the first question at a Chav quiz night?

"What you lookin' at?"

10. How do you get 100 Chavs into a phone box?

Paint go-faster stripes on it.

11. Two Chavs in a car without any music. Who's driving?

The police

12. What do you call a chav with 9 GCSE's?

A liar.

13. What do you say to a chav with a job?

Can I have a Big Mac please.

14. What do you say to a chav in a suit?

Will the defendant please stand

15. What do you call a knife in chav-ville?

Exhibit A

16. Why is 3 chavs going over a cliff in a Nova a shame?

A Nova seats 5

17. What do you call a 30 year old chavette?

Granny.

18. How many chavs does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, they'll screw anything.

19. What do you call 100 chavs at the bottom of a river?

A start.

20. How many chavs does it take to clean a floor?

None, "That's some uvver bleeders job innit."

21. Why did the chav take a shower?

He didn't mean to, he just forgot to close the Nova's window in the car
wash.

22. Why did the Chav cross the road?

To start a fight with a random stranger for absolutely no reason
whatsoever.

23. What do you call a Chav at college?

The cleaner.

24. Two chavs jump off beachy head, who wins?

Society.

25. A bus full of Chavs were driving through Wales. As they were
approaching Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerichgwyndobwyllantysyllyog ogogoch
they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They
argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the
counter, one Chav asks the blonde employee, "Before we order, could you
settle an argument for us?

Would you please pronounce where we are.. very slowly?"

The blonde girl leans over the counter and says,

"Burrrrrrrr-gerrrrrrr-Kiiiiing

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Just To Say Hi / Re: g'day

« on: June 21, 2006, 04:09:27 pm »

well im back (got back yesterday actually, but havent had time to post) had a great time again this year, good to meet up with some regulars again. couldnt get online to keep the thread goin during the week, so it had to be temporarily neglected! ah well, at least ive got loads of pics to peice together my memory....

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Just To Say Hi / Re: g'day

« on: June 09, 2006, 05:13:47 pm »

but why would you do that?!

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General Discussion / Re: The (Unrelated To Le Mans) Joke Thread

« on: June 09, 2006, 04:54:27 pm »

How to impress a woman...
wine her
dine her
call her
hug her
hold her
surprise her
compliment her
smile at her
laugh with her
cry with her
cuddle her
shop with her
give her jewellery
buy her flowers
hold her hand
write love letters to her
write poetry for her
go to the ends of the earth and back for her

How to impress a man...
show up naked
bring beer

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Just To Say Hi / Re: g'day

« on: June 09, 2006, 04:42:23 pm »

now now, lets not lower this thread into do it/dont do it's, we need to keep it on topic!

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General Discussion / Re: Stella Bar Open or Shut

« on: June 09, 2006, 04:24:53 pm »

Quote from: Steve Brown on June 09, 2006, 04:22:57 pm

Quote from: Rob on June 09, 2006, 04:18:16 pm
im sure someone out there must have a picture?!

Here it is, at the top of the Mulsanne, taken by me at 2004s PQs.