Sorry Your Godliness, I was called away to a incident at Windy Miller's. I will endeavour to keep an eye on this most Holy of threads to make sure it stays where it rightly belongs!

BTW, did you realise that both www.mopedboy.com and www.mopedboy.co.uk are both available! As is www.altarboy.co.uk.

Perhaps you could hold a collection at your next service so that we can give him his own website?

Probably Pike......ys  

But I'm a 70's kind of guy. I even ride round without a helmet  

A likely story. If you were operating out of Thailand your cat would have been on your menu by now!

I get quite a bit of Flak at the station because of my model looks, but I don't need any extra form of protection!  

This Felix gets everywhere. I'm sure his caravan looks like Hell's Kitchen though!

Fran, you seem like a nice lady. Do you like men in (or out of) uniforms?

As far as I am aware, you need a license to get insurance, and be resident in the country you wish to be insured in!

More dodgy dealings in markets?

I've got my eye on you, and your slippery, fishy fingers!!  

Why DR??

Blimey, that almost sounds like my crime fighting friends Penfold.  (Crumbs DM)

It was all alcahol induced.  After several pints Raoul started to look relatively attractive. I'd say he's about an eight pinter!

Not as attractive as the likes of Miss Lovelace of course (or her little dogs for that matter) Now there's a real woman who I wouldn't mind sharing my tent with at Le Mans!!  

It wasn't an affair, it was just a drunken one night stand!!

Now that I am sober again, I have realised that Raoul is a decieving little villain who must be further punished, and I am just the person to punish him, after all, a little Police brutality never hurt anyone (unless you are Rodney King)  

As for my truncheon, I'd like to know where you hid it you little git. Perhaps that's why you didn't sit down for a while and were standing very upright??  Was it conceiled about your person. Is that why you had a such a grin all evening??  

Whilst I am unsure whether my truncheon will ever see the light of day again, I have put an order in to the Regional Police Authority (in Trumpton) for a new style baton. I've chosen the type below as used by the Scottish forces!

Errrr.......Camberwick Green of course!!!!!!  

I think I might join you.  Just in case Raoul turns up!!!!

How about Camberwick Green???