Balls to the Llamas, alpacas and other camelids. And to the Sussex Poultry Fanciers Society who were displaying at the show too. Although I have to say some of their rare breed chickens looked absolutely delicious.

But not a totally wasted weekend. I dug the Commer out and fired the little rascal up. Runs like a dream. After a quick scrub out with a big bucket of Jeyes fluid to get rid of the appallling mildew (it leaks bad) its now almost no longer a health hazard. So it's off down to the MOTers this week and fingers crossed. The only problem I can foresee is a shock absorber leaking, but £20 to the examiner last year soon "stiffened" it up to acceptable levels.

Rock and roll!!

(Well that's what it does when it's on the road.)

Andy Z

Matt,

Ah, the old Teachers tits/O Level pass conundrum, I remember it well. Although I have to say I thought a Brownian Motion was what you had on the sunday morning after days of warm Boddingtons, cold merguez and that ham which you thought was probably okay even though it did smell a bit funny. A case of "Speak up Brown, you're through".

And yes, I forget to mention that you need to attach a compressor to the wet towels. A big mother, like at Kwikfit.

As far as tippers go, this disgraceful behaviour is bad manners and a warning sign of a raft of other psycological problems like inferiority complex and low self esteem.

The bottom line is if you don't want one, don't have one. And I would never make someone drink against their will. But I hate to see ale go to waste, so if you open one, you must drink it. I suspect one of our lot is a "closet tipper". And I'm going to catch the fukka this year and expose him for the lilly livered beer dodger he is.

Likewise I look forward to meeting you and DH, it's got to be the Champers bar at 9.00. Incidentally, have you become all "Yankified" by living in the States these last few years? I only ask as one of our mob isn't coming to Le Mans this year as he moved to Cayman Islands six months ago to work with some Americans. Already he's whooping and hollering and f**k*n' A-ing with the best of them.

Andy Z

How about a compromise? Cover the bin in wet towels. Bingo!

It's not scheduled till 2004. But I also heard it's in July not Sept like this year. Anyway, I would not be surprised if it doesn't go ahead at all, it cost the ACO over a million euros just to close the road last time and I understand they lost a packet overall. Great fun though I thought, just glad I was there.

Any news on the grid for this years support act, the Legends race?

Andy Z

Last year there was some geezer over from the States. Not being rude, but if you're going to be a presenter on RLM you really ought to know how to pronounce Le Mans. And it's not "Leemarns".

Apparently he was some sort of Chrysler stoolpidgeon. I think was Titchmarsh (Ian, not Alan!) who very gently took the piss out of him.

As to the suggestion for CA members doing a stint, can you imagine the Rusty and Big H Show on the graveyard slot from 3-5 am? "A big hello to all you truckers out there..."

Having to cry off PQ this year, which is a nuisance, as I wanted to go and visit the ACO staff in the rotunde. Not to complaint about tickets etc, but because one of the girls who works there has got the most fantastic pair of tits.

Have a great time guys and Go Bentley!

Andy Z

Hi Matt

The P&O Pompey Express is one of these high tech  twin-hulled catamarans, constructed of alloy and plastic. It is designed to travel at 35 knots and gets to Cherboug in about two hours forty five. Which is fine when the channel is like a mill pond but don't even go there if it blows over a force 2.

It's definitley not for those who suffer from motion sickness!

Andy Z

PS Sorry if I made you feel ill, but think what it did to me.

Good. I hope it f**k*ng sinks. This vomit vessel should be scuttled off the Needles without further delay.

We went to the race on it last year and I have to say it was one of the most unpleasant experiences ever. There was a bit of a rough sea and within thirty minutes of sailing from Pompey, the whole boat was awash with sick. The acidic stink was absolutely unbelievable. Parties of skool kids were spraying it all over their teachers, who were drenched to the socks in bile and half digested baked beans and tomato skins. A bloke a few seats away spent an hour holding it down and when the pressure got too much, with an almighty heave, he projectiled all over the seat back in front of him producing a multicoloured fountain of puke. It sounded like Whhherrrpppaarrgghhh! Splash!

I was very impressed with the impeccable manners of a  elderly woman several seats away on the other side. She did it in quite a gentile way, pouring it into a sick bag without making any retching noise. It sounded just like a tin of tomatos being emptied into a saucepan. Very considerate but I think you'll agree it's not very nice when you're trying to eat, it nearly put me off my fried breakfast.

The crowning glory was when I slipped over backwards in a pool of spew in the toilets. Well I say spew, it was really more like a long streak of dog slother with all bubbles in it. My hand went in it and it was stone cold. GAKK!!

I could go on....

Even the duty free shop shut as bottles were crashing to the floor.

I hope you've got the picture. Never ever again!

Andy Z

A w**k sock has got to taste better than the doner kebabs available from the trackside catering. I saw them unpacking a new one once and the wrapper had "Medical Waste" stamped on it. In fact there was still a shoe on the end of it.

w**k*rs Arms. Christ, what's on the pub sign? Presumably an arm with the physique of a crabs claw. Just like my mate Chris!

And Rusty, in your deli will there be little sample bowls put out to let the punters try the wares before they buy. Ack!!

Andy Z

  :DBefore the old site vanishes forever, I thought it would be nice to see our old friend make one last fly past:
 
Resume' as follows:

Mark J. Cady Jr.
3018 Linwood Court
Royal Oak, Michigan 48073
U.S.A.
Home: 248.288.0713
Cell: 248.877.7779
E-address: gearhead.mark@prodigy.net


Objective

To manage or coordinate development activities involving aftermarket, show, prototype or production intent engines, transmissions, vehicles, vehicle systems, structures, interiors and, related components.

Experience

09/01¡VCurrent Woodward1 Group Farmington, MI
Product Development Manager
„h In charge of expanding the existing product line to include high performance engine parts, lightweight interior trim and instrumentation parts.
„h Continue the growth of the website to include an application database for the existing product line.
„h Supply sales support for all products. This duty includes travelling to trade shows throughout the continental U.S. Additional assignment is to coordinate show car activities involving mechanical and appearance updates.

04/99¡V03/01 DaimlerChrysler - DCTC Auburn Hills, MI
Engine Durability Test Engineer

„h Responsible for implementing future engine durability test programs involving 3 variations of the 2.4L, 2 variations of 3.7L, 3 variants of 4.7L, and 8.0L Viper as well as legacy 3.9L, 5.2L, 5.9L, and 8.0L Dodge Truck engines.
„h Specified and designed test equipment for use in various types of tests, most notably involving the durability testing of front end accessory drive systems. Recommended changes to testing regimen to more closely align it to end customer use.
„h Scheduled test engine build, METS cart test set up and, test cell utilization.
„h Supervised a team of technicians implementing test specifications.
„h Provided end of test report summarizing engine performance supported with written and graphical data.

04/98¡V04/99 DaimlerChrysler - JTE Detroit, MI
Engine Test Coordinator

„h Coordinated offsite engine development and durability testing with Tier 1 suppliers as well as with various testing houses. Responsibilities included coordinating the testing of engines and vehicles in Canada, Mexico and Germany.
„h Generated bills of material for set up parts reflecting each type of engine tested offsite.
„h Scheduled test engine build, METS cart test set up and, test cell utilization.
„h Supervised technicians to implement the build up and shipment of engines, transmissions and vehicle related parts to support offsite testing.
„h Provided end of test report summarizing engine performance supported with written and graphical data.

04/95¡V04/98 DaimlerChrysler - JTE Detroit, MI
Prototype Coordination Engineer

„h Coordinated data transfer to suppliers of cylinder head components. Scheduled and supervised rapid prototype models and finished products for use as patterns and tooling.
„h Purchased prototype parts for ferrous and non-ferrous metal castings and moldings, light metal die-castings, high performance polymers and machined parts involved in cylinder head assemblies.
„h Coordinated and negotiated on-time deliveries of the needed parts quantities as determined by program direction, timing and engineering DVP&R¡¦s. Accomplished a 12-week turn around from design to run on a cylinder head program.
„h Supported all Dodge Truck engine activities with various suppliers for production intent and racing proof of concept engines.

03/92¡V04/95 DaimlerChrysler - JTE Detroit, MI
Test Technician

„h As Senior Technician, directed 4 technicians while implementing the use of Modular Engine Test Stands (METS carts) for the new Durability Test Wing at JTE. Designed and built standardized wiring, plumbing and exhaust systems to minimize removal and set up time of engines between tests.
„h Advanced to Senior Technician. Experience included lead technician role in development of high performance 5.9L, 8.0L Truck and Mk.I and Mk.II 8.0L Viper engines.
„h Test Technician responsibilities included recording data hourly, servicing, repairing, and rebuilding engines as directed or needed by the test design.

06/88¡V03/92 DaimlerChrysler - JTE Detroit, MI
CDI Contract Test Technician

„h Responsibilities as a Test Technician included recording data hourly, servicing, repairing, and rebuilding engines as directed or needed by the test design. Additional duties included the generation of a shift report, then recording it to a database.

Other Related Experience

05/87¡V06/88 Defiance SMC - Senior Test Technician Troy, MI
04/86¡V05/87 Defiance STS - Senior Test Technician Westland, MI
08/84¡V04/86 Defiance STS - Test Technician Westland, MI
04/83¡V08/84 Lotus Engineering (formerly MARCO)
- Test Technician Ann Arbor, MI
10/81¡V06/82 Arcure Motors - Auto Repair Technician Ann Arbor, MI
08/81¡V10/81 McLaren Engines - Test Technician, Engine Builder Livonia, MI
06/80¡V08/81 The Sports Car Exchange - Auto Repair Technician Dearborn, MI
05/79¡V06/80 Erhard Motors - Auto Repair Technician Birmingham, MI
03/78-05/79 Penske Auto Center (formerly K mart) ¡V Manager Farmington, MI

Extracurricular Activities

11/01¡VCurrent Waterford Hills Road Racing Course Royal Oak, MI
Marketing Member
„h Member of the 8 person marketing team for the Waterford Hills Vintage Automobile Races held in conjunction with the Meadowbrook Concour d¡¦Elegance.
„h Assignment is to help define a separate identity for the races apart from the Concours. I will contact and present proposals for sponsorship to potential sponsor partners. My responsibility will include generating and distributing press releases for automotive periodicals, internet, radio and television mediums.
Duties also include sourcing all needed items for sponsors and the attending public. On race weekend, I will be a facilitator between sponsors and the race organizers.

Motorsports
„h Have been involved in various vehicle build, maintenance, marketing and photography projects involving domestic and import high performance street cars and trucks, CART, SCCA Sport Car and Pro-Rally, IMSA, IHRA, NHRA and IRL teams throughout my life.

Education

1975¡V1976 Attended Oakland Community College Farmington Hills, MI
1985¡V1986 Attended Henry Ford Community College Dearborn, MI
„h Two years studies of Engineering and Business related courses.

Corporate Training

11-02-2000 Title: Engine Diagnostic Training Course Code: ATPEDT999
10-02-2000 Title: I-Box 2+ Hardware Procedures Course Code: ATPIBH999
05-31-2000 - 06-01-2000 Title: Interpersonal Management Skills Course Code: MEEFLN600
11-30-1999 - 12-03-1999 Title: Scientific Test Facility Course Code: ATPSTG999
11-20-1997 Title: Goal Setting and Action Planning Course Code: DQIQFT300
10-19-1995 Title: Corporate Activity Based Costing Course Code: ABCABC102
07-17-1995 - 07-18-1995 Title: Problem Solving / R.C.A. Workshop Course Code: MEERCA102
06-01-1993 Title: Officevision Mainframe Computing Course Code: NTTOFV200
05-21-1992 Title: Employee Orientation Program Course Code: IPPEOP100
11-1987 Title: ANYSIS Modal Analysis Workshop
08-1986 Title: Straingage Function and Applications Workshop
03-1985 - 06-1985 Title: Electro-hydraulic Servo Circuits
01-1985 - 03-1985 Title: High Pressure Hydraulic Systems

Interests

My family, motorsports, rollerblading, photography, and on-road and off-road cycling.

References

OEM

Mr. Andrew Mueller
Supervisor - Engine Test Management
c/o DaimlerChrysler
800 Chrysler Drive
Auburn Hills, MI
CIMS 486-10-15
248.944.2997
atm@daimlerchrysler.com

Mr. Cecil Brown
Test Engineer - Engine Test Management
c/o DaimlerChrysler
800 Chrysler Drive
Auburn Hills, MI
CIMS 486-10-15
248.944.3257
clb18@daimlerchrysler.com

Mr. John D. Scott
Manager - Engine Test Management
c/o DaimlerChrysler
800 Chrysler Drive
Auburn Hills, MI
CIMS 486-10-15
313.493.2180
jds13@daimlerchrysler.com

Mr. Irv K. Zwicker
Manager - NASCAR Chassis Systems
c/o DaimlerChrysler
14250 Plymouth Road
Detroit, MI 48227
313.493.2567
ikz@daimlerchrysler.com

Mr. Dean Hauersperger
NVH Engineer
c/o General Motors Powertrain
810.575.2771
dean.hauersperger@gm.com

AFTERMARKET

Mr. Dan Crower
Owner
c/o Crower Motorsport
15737 Lyons Valley Road
Jamuel, CA 91935
619.669.7261
crowermtsp@k-online.com

Mr. Devin Rickey
Engineer
c/o Caldwell Development
1271 Activity Dr
Vista, CA 92083
760.599.8020

Mr. Paul Morrison
Owner
c/o Woodward1
P.O. Box 370
Farmington, MI 48332-0370
248.478.9235
pmorrison@woodward1.com

Mr. Mark Pierson
Manager - Product Development
c/o Wheel Vintiques
5468 E. Lamona Ave.
Fresno, CA 93727
209.251.6957
markp@wheelvintiques.com

FG

Why have we not heard from you for the best part of twelve months?

Andy Z

  I've got a terrible does of the rare disease called ZARSE - Zesty Acute Rectal Smells and Emphysemia.

But hey, what's the big problem? Even if Canada Phil brings SARS over from Toronto, there is already a very good cure. It's called Grimbergen. Apparently, it's best drunk whilst eating a raw turnip and lying down.

I thought about taking the wife's Alfa 147 but as I want something a bit more reliable I'm taking the 1969 Commer van.

What can I add? Nothing really, as I've never stayed on MB before. We were on Houx Annexe last year too so MB'll be a learning curve for me as well.

All I have heard about MB is that there's always music in the air, it's usually the Village People with their hits "In the MB" and "YMBA".  The great smell of Brut 33 hangs heavy in the Jonathan King Memorial Toilet block. Quite a few German bikers on Harleys stay there too. So take your tight cut off jeans and leather doillies and find your inner self.

Oh, and don't drop the soap in the shower.

Andy Z

PS On friday afternoon, H and his performing Jaguar will entertain us outside the Sports Bar.