On the subject of food. I was reading an article the other day about what the cunning Swiss get up to underground these days. It seems that when they're not having fist fights on the pavement over the correct time, they love to bash things into each other. In particular, very very tiny things, smaller even than your winkle on a parky winters morning, - neutrons and protons and such like. Not only have they decided on using eeny weeny stuff, but I suppose to compensate for the smallness of it all, they make sure they hit each other at a fair lick. And I mean sharpish, these things could be in and out of your trousers before you can swallow your mouth full of cornflakes and raise your eyebrows. In fact, give or take a little bit, they're doing roundabout 156,000 miles per second. That's half a million miles an hour, with or without speed cameras. They wind 'em up to this speed in a hoop shaped tube 17 km long buried in the Swiss ground. Bearing in mind the size (or lack of it) of these fellas, how the boys they get them to collide at all is a miracle of decent proportions. The finished article is a bit of an anti climax though, a photograph of what looks like a few pubes on a restaurant table, and there's no whooping and hollering.
I reckon they've got it all wrong, they should have involved more Germans. If they had, then instead of these tiny dots whizzing round, they'd be colliding sausages by now. Can you imagine it!? Dragging a bratwurst up to that speed in one direction, and setting off a merguez in the other, and taking bets! Now that's what I'd call entertainment.
H
