I think you're more likely to get a ban for staying on topic around here

So to risk my account... I'd ignore what you've heard about BSJ, it's a full on campsite like HA, there's the usual facilities & a shuttle bus to take you to the village, they do seem to put a lot of people on there but it is a big field!!
If you order 1 ticket with the ACO you may get what you asked for, if not you could always park the car at BSJ & camp with your mates (as long as you don't mind leaving the car!!) or arrange to camp with some friendly CA members!!

As for Portsmouth/Southampton, I've no idea of the quality of women there, although apparently there's some game called football & a bloke called Harry that is causing a bit of a stir down there??