Department of Transport Initiative

[Jay (Team Cannonball)]

DEPT OF TRANSPORT INITIATIVE - MAY 2006.

Information Release.


There is concern over the current driving standards in England, so the Department of Transport have devised a scheme to identify poor and dangerous drivers.

This system will allow all road users to recognise the potentially hazardous and dangerous ones, or those with  limited driving skills.

From the middle of May 2006 all those drivers who are found to be a potential hazard to all other road users will be issued with a white flag, bearing a red cross.

This flag clearly indicates their inability to drive properly.

These flags must be clipped to a door of the car and be visible to all other drivers and pedestrians. Those drivers who have shown particularly poor driving skills will have to display two flags:

One on each side of the car to indicate an even greater lack of skill and limited driving intelligence.

Please circulate this to as many other motorists as you can, in order that drivers and pedestrians will be aware of the meaning of these flags.



Thank you for your co-operation.

Department of Transport.

[Andy Zarse]

Addendum from the DofT:

This ruling also applies to bad drivers in Scotland. They will also be obliged to proudly fly a white flag bearing a red cross in the centre. It was originally suggested that a blue Cross of St Andrew be utilised, however, due to continuing disappointing sports results, they are not currently on general sale in Scotland. And if they are, it's in a tacky Edinburgh tourist shop, handily placed between the tins of authentic shortbread and plastic Loch Ness monsters.

[hgb]

Shouldn't road numpties be black flagged ? 

[Sooty]

I may purchace a pair of these flags and install them on Jay's car at LM!

This is a punishment for a poor attempt at humour although I'm sure his driving could do with some attention!

You have to be in it to win it!!

[Jay (Team Cannonball)]

The green eyed monster has struck. I will still be proudly wrapped in my saltire on race day.

[tommy84]

I'd rather see rookie-bumpers - a yellow stripe across the rear bumper.

So that you now where you can drive extremly close behind, flash the lights and rubbin' them.

Rubbin', son, is racing

[Sooty]

Jay, come over to BSJ for a few cold ones and we will present you with your flag!

[Jay (Team Cannonball)]

Sooty,

Me and the rest of Team Cannonball (8-9 of us) are on BSJ. You better watch out we might end up next to you.  Just the two jocks (Me and Al) with us though so we are going to have to put up with World Cup Fever from the rest of them.

[Sooty]

Jay,

Was Al the drunk one at Silverstone?? LOL

[Jay (Team Cannonball)]

Yes, Al was the embarassment that was the ranting drunken Scotsman, who passed out in the chair. His problem is he isn't a big motorsports fan he just comes for the beer. Hence he ends up wasted, talks crap and falls asleep.

[Andy Zarse]

Hence he ends up wasted, talks crap and falls asleep.

Jay, I'm fairly certain I once met Al on the train down from Glasgow.

"I will skive, skive and skive again!"

[Jay (Team Cannonball)]

Unfortunately thats not far from the truth except Al is from Elgin (far north) and that makes him even harder to understand.