And he got an upgrade on the way home whilst wearing a baseball cap 
Yes Bob, but we were only seated in Premium Economy, so it hardly counts as there was no champagne on tap, you actually had to ask for it. Also, you only got reclining seats and more leg room, not the proper lie-flat bed I'd have prefered, though Premium's quiet as it's positioned in front of the engines. However, what we really wanted, and could have rightfully expected, was Upper Class. Unfortunately the aeroplane was full to bursting, as you might have noticed, and the check-in staff gave us some flannel about full fare paying passengers having preference, or some such nonsense. So Premium it was, and I can say I felt very let down at being seated there instead of Seat 1A in Upper.
You might also recall I came down the back to say hello to you guys mid-flight. I was horrified at the cramped conditions you economy travellers have to endure, stuffed in with all the unwashed "ordinary" people, farting and snorring. I've never seen, or smelt, anything quite like it. It was quite an eye opener I can tell you. Is that what it's always like back there, all crammed in like common veals in a crate? Dear God, never let me have to endure this wretched class of travel.
