Room in the tunnel?

[mgmark]

Oh H,

Please just crack on and remember one's innate superiority as an Englishman.  Pitch up with a classic British car.  A Jaguar MkII will do nicely.  Shout loudly.  When they fail to respond, shout louder.  Something along this lines of "I am a British Citizen and Her Majesty requires that you let me through this piffling border which we do not recognise".  Shout louder still.  When they fail to understand, simply drive through and threaten them with your piles.  That should sort the diplomatic problem out.  The RAF will be ready and waiting to provide fire support if it is needed....

MG Mark

[Doris]

H,

If you're going to book Le Shuttle book it early - like now.  Prices ramp up nearer the date of travel.  I've booked mine today for the bargain price of £88! 

As Tom says Brittany Ferries are going to have to try much harder to get my business back.

Dx

[Nordic]

You can use Tesco Club Card points on the Euro Tunnel, which means for £22 worth or vouchers your get £88 worth of ticket.

However, I somehow doubt that H shops in tesco's, strikes me as a waitrose person, but it may be worthwhile to know for someone else.

[Andy Zarse]

...I somehow doubt that H shops in tesco's, strikes me as a waitrose person...

Hmmm, you may have something here Nordic. Although not widely reported, a man was recently arrested for masturbating onto a packet of Birds Eye Potato Waffles in the frozen section of Waitrose in Horsham. Now I know they're "waffley versatile" but the whole town was up in arms about it, and whilst he was out on police bail some of the locals ganged together with burning torches and he had to flee for his life. The police let him off with a caution and told him if he wanted to do that kind of thing, then he should go to ASDA in Crawley. FWIW, my advice is to stay away from chopped and shaped potato products as a general rule of thumb, especially breadcrumbed ones that look like dinosaurs, it's a road that leads nowhere.

I digress. As I see it, the tunnel is the channel's Asda, compared to Brittany which are more a seaborne Waitrose; you pays your money and takes your choice. It's just a bit disappointing when the expensive option comes complete with that kind thing going on in the aisles.

A word of advice: You'll all be relieved to note that Team Zarse, and by definition Chris Zarse specifically with his habitual onanism, no longer travel by Brittany Ferries, so if you want to avoid shameless public displays of self-abuse by a Ray Mysterio impersonator, you'd be well advised to avoid Transmanch to Le Havre on wednesday. Hope this helps.

[BigH]

It's all good advice, and I'd be a fool to ignore it.
So then, it's one request to board at conversation level, one at a bawl, and then I drop my trousers. I think it best if it's a French ferry, after all it's a language they understand.
Who can forget - "See-uit! SEE-UIT!!!, this is not a suit, it's the uniform of Her Majesties Air Force!"...
Nordic has me pegged, although the Gents toilet in our local Waitrose has a terrible reputation, both with the locals, and most of the emergency services, - and I suppose even Waitrose has to draw the line over what they'll recycle. Mind you, exactly why a starving tribe in the Sudan needs a twin set, a cashmere cardigan and a years worth of Beautiful Garden back issues, I can only guess.
Glad to hear Chris is well.
H